


Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

by GizmoTrinket



Series: Smut Sunday [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Coming Untouched, Dildos, Dom/sub Undertones, For Science!, M/M, Mutual Masturbation, Phone Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-12 03:20:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,708
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11728419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GizmoTrinket/pseuds/GizmoTrinket
Summary: Takes place after season four and Smut Sunday part 1, see tags





	Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

**Author's Note:**

> Prompts (link to tumblr):  
> [3\. “woah what happened while I was gone” 4\. “wait no that’s mine what are you doing” ](http://otp-imagines-cult.tumblr.com/post/140922926707/otp-quotes-challenge)  
> [2\. phone sex or sexting](http://minnothebunny.tumblr.com/post/137185416525/smutty-prompts)
> 
> Phone sex really isn't my kink so I just did my best.  
> Also, I'm looking at these titles wondering if I have a problem. O_o

John was away at a medical conference.

Sherlock was frustrated. He wasn't an overly sexual being but John was and Sherlock's transport had developed some bad habits. And not just sexual ones either. Sherlock was used to sleeping next to John now. He had tried cuddling up to Rosie but he was too afraid of rolling over and knocking her out of the bed or squishing her. A quick internet search justified his fears.

So Sherlock was tired and overly emotional when he stumbled onto the crime scene and saw _him_.

\----

"John," Sherlock said on his nightly phone call with his John, "I have something to confess."

"Oh, God, what did you do? Please tell me you didn't put acid in the tub again."

"No, of course not." Sherlock's teeth bit into his lip. He wasn't sure how John would react and he was terrified one day something he considered small would scare John off. Lestrade said he needed to talk to John about this but...

"Sherlock?"

"Hold on." Sherlock put the phone down and John could hear in the background, "Wait, no! That's mine. What are you doing?!"

When the muffled sounds came over the receiver that signalled Sherlock was back John asked, "You're not trying to teach Rosie chemistry again, are you? I told you she's too young."

"What? No. Don't be ridiculous John."

"Ok." Since Sherlock didn't seem to be saying anything and there wasn't anything John could do from where he was John decided to try something. "So, I know you miss me-" Sherlock scoffed but more out of show than anything else, "-and I miss you too. Do you know what I'm doing right now?"

"You're sitting on the hotel bed talking to me."

"Yes," John said patiently. "But I'm also stroking my cock."

"Oh." Sherlock hadn't considered this. "You want to have phone sex."

"Yes." John said with a smile. "Go to the room."

Sherlock shut the bedroom door.

"Take off your clothes."

Sherlock managed to do so while staying on the line, his excited pants coming over the speaker and going straight to John's cock.

"Open the drawer; I left you a little something inside." John said teasing his frenulum as he imagined Sherlock's expression as he found the dildo.

"This isn't little, John."

John giggled. "Yeah, I guess not. Do you see the lube?" When Sherlock grunted an acknowledgement John said, "Suck on the dildo as you finger yourself."

"Oh." Sherlock gasped.

John loved this, Sherlock wasn't all that experienced and sex was one of the few areas where John could manage to surprise the genius. "Wait, turn on the camera, I want to see you."

It took a bit to connect. The video was grainy and had a lot of pixels but John could see Sherlock's beautiful cupid's bow mouth stretched around the hard plastic, the shine of spit coating it and running down his chin.

"Oh, fuck." John squeezed the base of his cock to calm down.

Sherlock moaned at John's expression and hand to take his hand off his cock to shove the dildo back in his mouth as it had slipped and was sliding out.

"You'll have to be careful with that, k? It-"

Sherlock's inarticulate muffled mumblings cut John off. It was clear he already knew the risks hard plastic posed in one's rectum. Then he had to move his hand up to push the dildo back in place.

"Christ, Sherlock. You'll be the death of me." John needed friction so he started moving his hand again.

Sherlock's eyes crinkled as he smiled wickedly. The phone moved and John could see two of Sherlock's fingers entering his arse.

John felt his eyes widen and he gasped.

Sherlock's large hand fondled his testicles before stroking his cock. Then they travelled back down... The camera moved up again and John could see Sherlock was starting to get sweaty. He looked half wrecked already. Sherlock mumbled and John understood he was saying your turn.

John fumbled with his phone until Sherlock could see John moving his hand up and down his shaft. He teased the tip a few times before bringing the camera back up so Sherlock could see his face. "Another finger." John panted. "Add another finger and let me see."

The phone moved so John was looking at the ceiling then turned. The angle was a little off but it was clear Sherlock was obeying. John could see Sherlock's hand moving and hear broken muffled moans as he fucked himself on his long fingers.

"Face! Let me see you." John said, his movements on his cock moving faster.

The screen went black before showing a blurry vision of a wrecked Sherlock moaning lewdly around a dildo. "onnnmm!"

John knew Sherlock was crying out his name. "Stop, stop. Don't come yet!"

Sherlock whimpered and closed his eyes. His nostrils were flared as he breathed around the hard plastic in his mouth.

"I want you to use the dildo. Let me see your face, put the phone on the pillow and get on your hands and knees."

Sherlock shook his head and rolled onto his side holding the phone out and his leg up at an angle. His red cock jutting out and (John imagined as the picture quality was too poor to see for sure) leaking.

"Yeah, yeah, that works. That's good. Take it." John grunted as his hand slid up and down his dick.

Sherlock threw back his head, exposing his neck. John imagined dragging his tongue along the length of it. Tasting the salt of his sweat and biting down, sucking bruises into it.

"John, John, John..." Sherlock chanted.

"I'm here. I'm here. You can come like this, I want to see you."

Sherlock whimpered; his arm twisted more and moved faster.

"Open your eyes." John ordered.

Sherlock did and when their eyes met John came.

"Fuck." John worked himself through the orgasm and tried to keep his eyes open. It was difficult but Sherlock was on the other side, a sweaty writhing mess and that was a thing of beauty.

"Johnnn~" Sherlock mewled.

"Come Sherlock." John ordered, His cock was spent and it was Sherlock's turn.

"ARGUH!" Sherlock shouted as he came untouched, his body jerking wildly. The phone was dropped at one point and John heard Sherlock moan and pant as the camera focused their bedroom ceiling through a film of lube.

John's cock twitched sympathetically. He really wished he'd been there for that.

"Jooooohnnn." Sherlock whined.

"I'm not there. I can't clean you up this time."

The consulting menace made a disgruntled noise.

"C'mon, up you get. You hate sleeping in a mess."

The phone's angle swung and John was looking at Sherlock's pink glistening face. His curls were a dark tangled mess. "That's more fun when you're here."

"You'll have to note it on the chart."

"Mm. We'll have to try again though. Just to be sure."

"Anything for science." John said unable to keep a straight face.

They both broke out into giggles.

John stayed on the line while Sherlock cleaned himself off and checked on Rosie. There was an odd noise John couldn't place that seemed to be following Sherlock around. John was willing to stay on the line until Sherlock fell asleep but Sherlock said he needed to go out before bed.

John frowned, it seemed out of character. Usually they cuddled up together for a little lie down whenever they'd had sex but John thought maybe Sherlock had a crime scene or something to get to so he said goodnight.

Sherlock returned the sentiment distractedly before hanging up.

\----

John didn't receive a phone call from Sherlock the next night and his phone call went unanswered. He left a voicemail, "If you're on a case I hope you remembered to tell Mrs. Hudson to watch Rosie. I'll be home at noon tomorrow if you want to meet me at the station. I..." They hadn't said the words 'I love you' out loud to each other yet and John felt it might be a bit not good to do so in a voicemail. "...miss you. Don't get into too much trouble without me. See you tomorrow. 'Night."

\----

Sherlock didn't meet John at the station. When John climbed the seventeen steps up to their flat he noticed the door was closed. Mrs. Hudson didn't greet him and he didn't hear Rosie crying. The door was locked which was odd in itself but John had a key and he opened the door cautiously. Sherlock would tell him if one of his experiments went rogue and Baker Street was evacuated, wouldn't he?

Something furry ran and brushed past John's legs with a happy bark.

"No! Gladstone! Come back!" Sherlock shouted. "Mrs. Hudson, I told you-" When Sherlock looked up he saw it was John and cut himself off. "Oh. You're back. Welcome home."

John looked at the flat. The couch was destroyed. The coffee table had been gnawed on and there were books pulled off the shelves with half the covers eaten. "Whoa, what happened while I was gone?"

"We got a dog. Obviously." Sherlock said but he was hunched in on himself as if he was waiting for a reprimand.

"Why?"

"Well, technically the dog is a murderer. It was fantastic, John!"

John smiled and entered the flat, "Go get our dog and tell me all about it."

"We can keep him, right?"

"Doggie." Rosie agreed without so much as greeting John.

John sighed. "Yes. Just go fetch him before he eats Mrs. Hudson."

Sherlock scrambled to his feet and ran out the door.

John kissed his daughter hello (she squealed in delight and greeted him by smearing pureed peas on his face) and set his stuff in their bedroom. The dido was on the bed, it looked like it'd been used again. John smiled, glad that Sherlock liked it. John had some plans for that.

After putting his clothes to be washed and cleaning his face John saw that Sherlock had returned and the door was once again closed. "So, how is our dog a murderer?" John asked.

"Oh, John! It was brilliant!" Sherlock started making tea and John settled in for a long story already thinking of blog titles.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I read a story where the cat was the murderer ([Colors by Quesarasara](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1606910/chapters/4887873)) and it was so fantastic I had to borrow the idea.


End file.
